My Biggest Fear

By Lindsey Roberts

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“My biggest fear…” I could tell him my biggest fear, but he wouldn’t understand it. Only two people in my life have understood it and one of them would never admit to understanding it. We are the 1%. The cosmic joke. The empty. The unexplainable.

We are living contradictions because we are not one person. No, we don’t have split personalities. We are always us. Always complicated, and always multiple things, never just one thing.

We want so badly to be a part of all this, but we will never be a part of this because we cannot commit to being one person. We will not take one path because we do not see the point in walking when the destination is not our decision. The destination is the same no matter the path. The walk is our decision.

The only time we can truly connect with someone is when it’s with our own kind, but to do this is to deepen the hole. We are the loneliest creatures in the universe.

We are also the best actors. So talented that you will never know us unless you are us. We are the unspoken race.

Humans write our story for us when we do not know the stories ourselves.

In this, I am telling you everything but you will learn nothing. That is our curse.

My biggest fear is that one day you will all understand us.

– Lindsey Roberts