Mickey Lennon, lost in thought, stepped off the curb safely into the street. The light, he knew, being solid red- it was red, he recalled, remembering that he noted that distinctly before allowing himself to wander among the thoughts he had himself queued to think- when a honking car went by him. Lunging backward, Mickey sees that the light is green. By the speed of the car, telling him that the car was able to approach the intersection without slowing and that the car didn’t recently transition from a paused state to a moving state, that the light had been green for significant time. Mickey questions the certainty of his life’s certainties.  

If Mickey’s life was the kind of life that was narrated, a narrator might put forward that Mickey had lived a good life thus far, 47 years, maintaining commitment to his confidences to this point; and that Epiphany makes the oddest visits, turning this harmless incident into a Moment where Mickey’s entire epistemology has become unsettled. Surely Mickey could come up with one other time in his life where he misremembered something. If Mickey’s life were being narrated, then surely that time would be recounted now, that and another time, and another, for Mickey has certainly misremembered any number of things without the recognition of misremembering having dislodged him from himself as at this moment. Has Mickey considered that he didn’t misremember the event at all? He saw the red light and assured himself the nature of the light would persist longer than it did, but by the time he reached the crosswalk, the light had changed. Instead, he was certain of the nature of the light and correct, but simply overesteemed its duration and took for granted a basic tenet of childhood, to double check the street before proceeding. Mickey did consider this. But Mickey is certain that he was certain it was red and would stay red and so didn’t need to double check the light or the street, even to see if a car were to trespass without a green through the intersection, color of the light be damned, yet even still, Mickey, habitually from youth through present day, is unable to brave any crossing on faith and surreptitiously glances at the walk sign each time even when the challenge he imposes on himself is to trust his trust and go without peeking, he remembers having looked up at the light right as he was nearing the curb, and so reassures himself that he was certain that he was certain and that his certainty was well founded. Applying this math to the equation’s other end, he cannot disregard that he is certain that he must doubt all things.        

– S. T. Brant