There’s a piece of trash at the gas station
Stationary, sitting on the sidewalk
Walking towards me is a woman
A woman that says,
“Hey boy, want some company?”
And when she asks if I want company
I do want company
But company shouldn’t present as it does presently
It presents as
Looking for you across the room
Room to grow in the space you gave me
Space that let me lean into uncertainty
Like I leaned into my mother’s arms
The day you left and when you left
I was all dressed up for church
It was a robin’s egg dress shirt
A blue to match the sky
And a tiny blazer that wasn’t quite my size
And you picked me up and kissed me Before saying goodbye
Before leaving my company
So when a lot lizard, a gas station hooker
Hikes up her skirt and asks if I want company
I do, but the company I want is you
So I stare at the trash
A McDonald’s wrapper wadded upLike the $5 bill you pressed into my hand for doughnuts
Do not pretend that what you did
Was anything but selfish
But I am selfish too
When I tear my eyes away from the trash
(not you, just the wrapper)
And look at the sky as blue as my shirt
And then into the eyes of the gas station hooker
Which are the color of the sky the color of my shirt
And say, “yes, I’d like some company”

– Katie Krantz