Dòng, Dòng—Dòng,
Zī—Zī-zī—Zīzī
Pèng——

first, a sharp sound pierces my ears
leaving me gasping for air.

my soul seems to leave my body,
as if the Black & White from the hell
are here to take me away.

my heart pounds wildly,
almost leaping out of the chest,
& my legs become floppy—
one word: panic.

like an earthquake is coming,
the life is slipping away. i’m filled with fear.
my lips instinctively turn into pale,
losing their colors.

gray steel plates surround me,
& yellow barriers block half of
the view. on the other side,

restaurants & shops,
students & tourists,
cars & motorcycles, coming & going.

this road has been repaired for ten years,
ever since i graduated from college.
it started even before i arrived at here.

excavators drill fiercely into the ground,
& chainsaws constantly buzz,
carving wounds into the earth.
dust rises—smoke blots out the sun.

yeah, the earth is assumed
not to bleed & not to cry.
as if it cannot feel any pains,
only enduring it in silence:

Dòng, Dòng—Dòng,
Zī—Zī-zī—Zīzī
Pèng——

but why has this road,
near the teaching buildings & the dorms,
—just one hundred meters long—
been under construction for ten years?

is it still a road?
or just a burning pit of money?

crowds of students & streams of
cars come & go every day.
there is a thriving tourist resort,
with mountains & with rivers.

but—
Dòng, Dòng—Dòng
Zī—Zī-zī—Zīzī
Pèng——
i didn’t see where the beauty is.

people come & go, but i can’t see them.
i plug my ears with my fingers, head bowed.
——the smell of decay spreads in the air,

i quickly cover my mouth &
my nose with a mask. the dust chokes
me & the sun is scorching.

i look up to the sky at a glance.
my vision blurs. a wave of
dizziness suddenly strikes. like falling into

a black hole, my chest feels heavily,
so heavily. i can’t even breathe.
the dark clouds have already eloped,
leaving only torn wisps behind.

those are sharp pains in my nerves
throbbing in my head, in order to
transport blood & oxygen.

then, i walk by & see
two people on the street
weave through the crowds,
laughing & talking.

– Shilong Tao

Author’s Note: This poem records the overwhelming sensory and emotional experience of living amidst the constant construction in the university and the city.