My two brothers share a bedroom in the middle of the hallway. I share a room with my sister down at the end, across from my mom and stepdad’s room.

My sister and I share one full-sized bed that’s pushed right up next to the window. I sleep on the window side. On the wall across from my sister’s side is a big mirror and when we jump on the bed, we watch ourselves in it.

Laughing.

Floating.

Hung up by a nail next to the mirror, right by the door frame, there’s a small, pink porcelain Lord’s Prayer wall plaque. It has dark pink and blue flowers in each of the rounded corners and the prayer is printed in fancy writing in the center.

Every night I clasp my hands underneath my chin and recite the prayer in my head as I kick my sister’s cold feet away. At the end of the prayer, I ask God for all the things I wish for: for the warts on my leg to go away, for my cavities to be fixed, for my hair to grow really long, for horses…for other things.

On the other side of the door frame, near the corner of the wall across from the front of the bed, are two small holes. My brother poked them through his closet and out our side. That way, we can all still secretly talk and play together when we are in trouble and get sent to our rooms.

When the door is open in our room, you can’t see the holes because they’re blocked by the door…and the holes in my brothers’ closet can be covered with junk or the closet door can be shut to hide them. Our secret.

Joking.

Playing.

The year I turned 11, My oldest brother made up a new game for our chatting holes. He only plays that one game. And only with me. Our secret.

Hushing.

Hiding.

That year, I took down the prayer plaque and shoved it deep under the clothes in the bottom drawer of the dresser.

– Tori Flint